Questions not usually asked…

1: Do you sleep with your closet doors open or closed?
Closed

2: Do you take the shampoos and conditioner bottles from hotel?
Uhh, no.  That stuff is cheap and worthless.

3: Do you sleep with your sheets tucked in or out?
I have a sleeping bag and a blanket.

4: Have you ever stolen a street sign before?
No, though I once helped a family member abscond with a fire hydrant…

5: Do you like to use post-it notes?
Not really.  Kinda low-tech.

6: Do you cut out coupons but then never use them?
No, I never bother cutting them out. They’re never for anything I want anyways.

7: Would you rather be attacked by a big bear or a swarm of a bees?
My odds of survival are a little better with the bees.

8: Do you have freckles?
No.

9: Do you always smile for pictures?
What is this smile you speak of?

10: What is your biggest pet peeve?
People who can’t seem to look beyond their own interests.

11: Do you ever count your steps when you walk?
Used to do cadences in my head when I was in the military, which is similar.  Took a long time to break that habit.

12: Have you ever peed in the woods?
Yes, and if you’d like video footage, just make your checks out to…

13: What about pooped in the woods?
Yeah.  Used to go on a lot of camping trips when I was younger.

14: Do you ever dance even if theres no music playing?
Can’t say that I do…

15: Do you chew your pens and pencils?
No way.  That’s nasty.

16: How many people have you slept with this week?
None.

17: What size is your bed?
Roughly sleeping bag-sized

18: What is your Song of the week?
Right here.

19: Is it okay for guys to wear pink?
Gender stereotypes are dumb.

20: Do you still watch cartoons?
Of course.  Pants optional, sugar-coated cereal mandatory.

21: Whats your least favorite movie?
Corpses are Forever.

22: Where would you bury hidden treasure if you had some?
All the treasure I hold dearest is buried in my mind.

23: What do you drink with dinner?
Usually Pepsi.

24: What do you dip a chicken nugget in?
I’ve taken a liking to Budweiser wing sauce.

25: What is your favorite food?
Pizza.  Nothin’ fancy here.

26: What movies could you watch over and over and still love?
I don’t have the attention span for this…

27: Last person you kissed/kissed you?
Next question!

28: Were you ever a boy/girl scout?
No, nor would I ever be.  The idea that boys and girls need to be taught different skills in order to become successful, productive members of society is about sixty years out-dated.

29: Would you ever strip or pose nude in a magazine?
No.

30: When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper?
Probably 2001, when I was in boot.

31: Can you change the oil on a car?
Who do you think does it?

32: Ever gotten a speeding ticket?
Oddly enough, no.

33: Ever ran out of gas?
Nah, I keep a reserve can for long trips.

34: Favorite kind of sandwich?
The Ultimate Sandvich is something I can’t make any more.  It requires specific cuts of turkey, ham, pepperjack cheese, and bacon.

35: Best thing to eat for breakfast?
I can’t eat right after I wake up.  Makes me sick.

36: What is your usual bedtime?
Depends on where I’m working, really.

37: Are you lazy?
I’m the hardest-working lazy person I know!

38: When you were a kid, what did you dress up as for Halloween?
Usually whatever dumb outfit my parents stuck me in.

39: What is your Chinese astrological sign?
Pig, and the description I’ve read on this simply doesn’t fit at all.

40: How many languages can you speak?
Three.

41: Do you have any magazine subscriptions?
Not any more.

42: Which are better legos or lincoln logs?
Who says you can’t combine them?

43: Are you stubborn?
Are you stubborn?

44: Who is better…Leno or Letterman?
Letterman.  Jay Leno just isn’t funny.

45: Ever watch soap operas?
I used to watch professional wrestling with my older brother, and I’m pretty sure that counts as a soap opera.

46: Are you afraid of heights?
Not at all.

47: Do you sing in the car?
Occasionally.

48: Do you sing in the shower?
Nah, roommates would hear it.

49: Do you dance in the car?
No, I drive in the car.

50: Ever used a gun?
I’ve shot all kinds of things, from handguns to anti-aircraft missiles.

51: Last time you got a portrait taken by a photographer?
Cripes, it’s been since I was in boot.

52: Do you think musicals are cheesy?
Yeah, I’m not a fan of musicals.

53: Is Christmas stressful?
Always.

54: Ever eat a pierogi?
Can’t say that I’ve ever been offered one.

55: Favorite type of fruit pie?
Blackberry.

56: Occupations you wanted to be when you were a kid?
Astronaut, mostly.

57: Do you believe in ghosts?
I can’t prove they don’t exist.

58: Ever have a Deja-vu feeling?
Yellow.

59: Take a vitamin daily?
I used to, back when I had iron problems.  Not so much now.

60: Wear slippers?
Sandals.  Close enough?

61: Wear a bath robe?
Not in years.

62: What do you wear to bed?
Nothing.  Clothes are just uncomfy when you’re trying to sleep.

63: First concert?
Journey.

64: Wal-Mart, Target or Kmart?
Whichever one actually has what I want.

65: Nike or Adidas?
Neither.  I wear police/military boots most of the time.

66: Cheetos Or Fritos?
I don’t really like either of them.

67: Peanuts or Sunflower seeds?
Both, equally.

68: Ever hear of the group Tres Bien?
No.

69: Ever take dance lessons?
No.

70: Is there a profession you picture your future spouse doing?
I can’t even picture a future spouse, let alone what they’d be doing.

71: Can you curl your tongue?
I can indeed!  Ladies, take note.

72: Ever won a spelling bee?
Sure did.

73: Have you ever cried because you were so happy?
I’m not prone to that sort of thing, no.

74: Own any record albums?
I had some vinyls when I was a sprout, but they’ve since moved on.

75: Own a record player?
Not any more.

76: Regularly burn incense?
Hell no.  I prefer clean, clear air without all the additives.

77: Ever been in love?
A few times, yeah.

78: Who would you like to see in concert?
The Black Mages.  I bet that’d be a hoot.

79: What was the last concert you saw?
My old man dragged me along to see Bob Sieger.  He nearly spent the night in jail, and I got felt up by some fat, middle-aged woman.  Not the proudest night of my life.

80: Hot tea or cold tea?
Tea is for sissies.

81: Tea or coffee?
Neither.

82: Sugar or snickerdoodles?
Neither.

83: Can you swim well?
Like a fish.

84: Can you hold your breath without holding your nose?
Yes.

85: Are you patient?
Are you almost done yet?

86: DJ or band, at a wedding?
Depends on who’s getting married, I guess.

87: Ever won a contest?
Yeah.

88: Ever have plastic surgery?
No.

89: Which are better black or green olives?
Neither.

90: Can you knit or crochet?
Nope.

91: Best room for a fireplace?
Living room, I guess.

92: Do you want to get married?
I’m not the sort of romantic girl that dreams of getting married someday.  If I meet a nice girl who fills the criteria (and my state/country gets over the whole same-sex marriage thing), then I’ll consider it.

93: If married, how long have you been married?
Not applicable.

94: Who was your HS crush?
How about we ask something relevant?

95: Do you cry and throw a fit until you get your own way?
Very rarely.  It usually doesn’t work.

96: Do you have kids?
No.

97: Do you want kids?
Hell no.

98: Whats your favorite color?
Hmm…

99: Do you miss anyone right now?
Some people and pets that aren’t among the living any more, I guess.